Adults complain that youth are impatient. Brain development research proposes processes of brain maturation that predispose the adolescent to risk taking and impulsivity. We are reminded on the news of the effects of technology on attention spans and links between screen time and depression. Yet, as adults with our seats well established at the table, we would be well served to tally our number of “clicks”. By this I mean, an analysis of what we ask, how we ask it, where we ask it, when we ask it, AND if in fact we are making ourselves vulnerable enough in our interactions with youth. How are we admitting our needs for assistance through asking? Or, are we merely inviting ourselves to tell? Edgar H. Schein in his book Humble Inquiry: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling describes both the process and importance of asking questions. He provides both definitions and examples to the point that
What we ask. . .
How we ask it. . .
Where we as it. . .
And, when we ask it. . .
All matter.
Since my coursework around educational theory like Funds of Knowledge, I believed in words like Schein’s. Still, each click to refresh my inbox or swipe of my phone should remind me that my weakness is the last part, “when”. As the adult participant in Youth-Adult partnership, the my greatest challenge rests in Tom Petty’s lyrics, the waiting, is the hardest part.
During my first days as a classroom teacher, I struggled to wait. I recall one activity in particular meant to highlight this practice for teachers. Its description went something like this. When speaking hold a ball. Toss the ball to the next speaker. Consider the ball’s path. Does it return to the teacher each time, or does it journey across the group equally? In order to address my own impatience at saving space for youth to guide conversations, I created activities that removed my voice from the equation. Small group discussions, pair shares, content posted on walls or materials spread across tables to explore. Did this work? For the most part yes. I impeded my own impatience. How did the youth feel? I don’t know. I never asked. It never occurred to me, nor did it occur to me to explain why I constructed the activities the way I did until I was coaching adult educators in Guatemala.
Working with youth or adults in community projects is difficult to not get carried away in the excitement that comes with creating. Opportunities to build or build on can seem to sit just out of reach, covered in shiny paper that as adults we want to tear off, instead of waiting for smaller hands to pick away at ribbon and tape. While the target age range for Community Youth Development programming is adolescent to early adult, the concept of wait time integrated into educational practice runs the continuum of preschool to Harvard (https://instructionalmoves.gse.harvard.edu/providing-wait-time-students-process-and-gain-confidence).
Using Schein’s work around humble inquiry in the context of Youth-Adult Partnership matters so that I am not only asking, but supporting others to ask. Ask themselves. Ask their peers. Ask their communities. This means that waiting for the smaller hands will mean more hands, more ideas, new perspectives and overall increased community capacity. In upcoming months, I will facilitate a series of focus groups in Rock County with youth around themes of success, community engagement and youth voice. The resources included below are meant to be reflective, and effective, in asking and answering and providing the essential wait time for authentic answers; moreover in sorting through what ‘we’ as adults have heard and what ‘we’ might still need to hear. I can hardly wait, although, it’s the hardest part.
RESOURCES
While I had previously read novels written by the author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, I watched her Ted Talk, The Danger of a Single Story, just this past month. We ask questions in an attempt to know and understand. However, when we stop asking, we immediately begin to risk limiting ourselves to single stories. Watch here: https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?language=en
The Circle Way, developed by Christina Baldwin and Ann Linnea, is one of a number of circle-based methodologies. It is an adaptable strategy that allows participants to gather around an idea and decide on a collective course of action. You can reference The Circle Way: A Leader in Every Chair or TheCircleWay.net. You can also watch The Art of Hosting-Open Space at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3jVOKQYm6E
When we ask questions of our community partners, it reads something like this https://blog-youth-development-insight.extension.umn.edu/2019/08/how-to-evaluate-collaboration.html. However, the web of networks must extend beyond the youth serving organizations to relationships and communication built between youth themselves adults and the community organizations in which they work and serve. You can read more results of enlisting youth as advocates and allies in these communities of practice in this fact sheet Increasing Social Capital through Culturally Relevant Positive Youth Development (PYD).
https://cyfar.org/sites/default/files/cyfar_research_docs/Increasing_Social_Capital_FactSheet.pdf
eXtension Diversity, Equity and Inclusion Community of Practice is a webinar focuses on three key areas of social justice: the basic concepts of social injustice within education, the community capitals framework and experiential frameworks to develop social justice youth development programs. The webinar features Nia Imani Fields, Ed.D. 4‑H Specialist and Principal Agent who is a member of the University of Maryland 4‑H Extension.
